Unfortunate Signs
posted 19-Nov-2017  ·  
1,893 views  ·   0 comments  ·  

Outside a farm: “Horse manure 50p per pre-packed bag; 20p do-it-yourself.”

In a baker’s window: “Try our homemade pies – they’re a real threat.”

In an office: “After tea break staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board.”

On a leaflet: “If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons.”

On a repair shop door: “We can repair anything. (Please knock hard on the door – the bell doesn’t work.”

In a health food shop window: “Closed due to illness.”

On a beach: “Quicksand. Any person passing this point will be drowned. By order of the District Council.”

In a dry cleaner’s window: “Anyone leaving their garments here for more than 30 days will be disposed of.”

In a safari park: “Elephants, please stay in your car.”

In a toilet in an office block: “Toilet out of order. Please use floor below.”

Outside a disco: “The most exclusive disco in town. Everyone invited.”

At a conference: “For anyone who has children and doesn’t know it, there is a day care on the first floor.”

Outside a secondhand shop: “We exchange anything – bicycles, washing machines, etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain?

On a church door: “This is the Gate of Heaven. Enter ye all by this door. This door is kept locked because of the draught (please use side door).”

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