A Woman’s Guide to Manspeak
posted 24-Jan-2018  ·  
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He says: “You deserve someone better than me.”

He means: “I’ve found someone better than you.”


He says: “it’s probably my fault.

He means: “It’s definitely my fault but there’s no way I’m going to apologize and the football’s about to start.”


He says: “We all need our own space.”

He means: “I’m up to something.”


He says: “What’s wrong?”

He means: “What meaningless, self-inflicted psychological trauma are you going through now?”


He says: “It’d take too long to explain.”

He means: “I’ve no idea how it works.”


He says: “I really want to get to know you better.”

He means: “So I can tell all my friends about it.”


He says: “I don’t know if I like her.”

He means: “She won’t sleep with me.”


He says: “I‘ve got my reasons for what I’m doing.”

He means: “I hope I think of some pretty soon.”


He says: “I can’t find it.”

He means: “It didn’t fall into my hands, so I’m completely clueless.”


He says: “No reason at all - I just remembered how much you like flowers.”

He means: “Forgive me, partner, for I have sinned.”

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